When They Don't See Your Value
There are going to be times in your life when others will not recognize your value. I know because I’ve experienced it on multiple occasions in my life. Although I consider myself a very strong person, who knows who I am, I must say that recently I had become very bothered by the inability of others to see the value I possess. It was honestly hurtful at first, not because I needed anyone to validate who I am…that I already know. I struggled more with “how people will often treat you when they can not see the greatness that God has placed in you. As a result, you tend to be the one excluded from activities, or colleague conversations because you are not considered “one of the the guys or girls.” Even when trouble shooting different problems on the job or in school, others are sought out for their ideas in problem solving. . .but not you. Over the years, I have come to realize and hold fast to the truth that it really doesn’t matter how others view me when I am following the will of God and pleasing God. My focus is on making sure that God’s view of me is excellent. Following and pleasing God are essential, because if I am not doing these two things and my character is outside of God’s will, then I should be concerned with how other’s perceive me, especially God.
I’m realizing more and more in life that some people are fickle. Fickle means “changing frequently, especially in regards to one’s loyalties, interest, or affection” (online dictionary). As a result, I can no longer spend my time wishing others would be just as loyal to me as I am to them. Moreover, I can’t expect them to see something in me that they simply don’t have the ability to do. You may be asking, Why don’t they have the ability? Well first off, many can’t because they don’t have insight. Insight means “the capacity to gain an accurate and deep intuitive understanding of a person or thing” (online dictionary). Believe it or not, everyone doesn’t have that ability. Even those that you think should have it because of the leadership roles they have –not all of them will. Some are not mature enough, some are not sensitive enough, and some…well, they just won’t. Honestly, they’re not capable. They are blind to seeing your value. Realizing this, set me free. Free from constant disappointment. Free from hurt. And quite frankly, it set me free from my mind being in bondage. The bondage is due to the constant wondering “is something wrong with me? Yet, you know that you are a wonderful person who is hardworking, intelligent, and gifted. The bondage is being around others that you know do not appreciate your presence and at times, your life.
Many of you may have had this experience in your life, or maybe you are experiencing it now. You are tired of feeling under valued. You are tired of working as hard as you work, and it being ignored or flat out insulted. You may be wondering how do you continue to work or live in such an environment. Well let me share with you what God has taught me while I was in this same predicament. First thing I had to reevaluate was –Is this (job, school, church, organization, etc.) where God has assigned me to be at this point in my life? If you determine that you are in the right place, then you must change your mindset. Mindset change #1 – Realize that it is God that has set your value and not another human being. What matters most is how God sees me. Once you realize God’s incredible value for your life, you will stop relying on others to confirm that there is greatness in you. Mindset change #2 – Move through your daily life with the assurance that although others may not or choose not to see your value–God sees it and honors it! Mindset change #3 – Don’t allow your disappointment in people’s inability to see your worth, to negatively impact your behavior and work ethic. Mindset change #4 – Walk demonstrating a visible confidence that you know you are great because God said so. This is not arrogance, its assuredness in who God says you are. Finally, Mindset change #5 – Trust that your time is coming where God will birth outwardly your greatness and purpose before others, even those that doubted you had anything to offer.